Thursday, May 20, 2010

Shocking Revelations and So Forth

So the media story is that Jessica Watson "sailed" around the world. Oh really? Well, I am here to tell you it is all a hoax! There are startling inconsistencies in Watson's story, and if you dig a little deeper you find a tissue of lies and cover-ups designed to prevent the people from discovering that the entire "round-the-world trip" was manufactured in a studio in front of a green screen. Jessica Watson's "circumnavigation" is no more real than Neil Armstrong's "moon landing"; Elvis's "death" or Simon Crean's "leadership of the ALP".

And now, finally, we have the photographic evidence to PROVE IT. Here we see a photo supposedly of Jessica "at sea". It's not immediately obvious, but if you look closely and for long enough, you will see clear evidence that she is nothing of the kind.

But anyway if you would like to read a bunch of funny jokes about Jessica Watson, check out my latest at New Matilda.


Unknown said...

Got it Ben. It took a while, but now I see. It's the flag, isn't it? Should be blowing straight out, and it's just sort of hanging. Now I'm a believer.

Dave in the Windy City! said...

Oh Wow!

As they taught us to say to each other back in Standup School....."haha, that's some really funny STUFF you got!"

Only thing is.....this wasn't even close to funny or even clever. These lines were funny after the moon walk in the 60's but now it just sounds lame. Better come up with some new STUFF Bud or we'll just be stumbling across your random Blog, but never see ya on Leno or Letterman!'

Ben Pobjie said...

Thanks for reading Dave in the Windy City! I would like to enrol in your private comedy classes; how much do you charge per hour to teach people like me how to be funny?

Unknown said...

Ben I think it's kind of wonderful that so many people in so many threads are prepared to give writers, FREE OF CHARGE, advice on how and what to write. I guess they are the carers of literature, unsung heroes, doing a job, for no money and no thanks, which is vital to our society. I know I am always grateful, and take copious notes.

Unknown said...

If you haven't seen it you might be amused by a comment on Ben Eltham's latest piece in which the two New Matilda Bens are confused with each other. Mr Eltham handles the situation with grace.

I have your feed working on my blog now - but note that the feed from my blog to here still has the wrong confusing title for some confusing reason.

Oh, and my daughter is going to buy a Pobjie tee shirt to help support you in your hour of need.

squib said...

Almost seamless photoshopping. I'm impressed! Good job